Finding Your Own North Star: Claiming the Life You Were Meant to Live

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Product Details

Author : Martha Beck
Binding : Paperback
EAN : 9780812932188
Edition : Reprint
Number of Pages : 400
Product Group : Book
Publication Date : 2002-01-29
Publisher : Three Rivers Press
Release Date : 2002-01-29

ASIN : 0812932188

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Editorial Reviews

From Amazon.com

Put the telescope away; the North Star mentioned here is a human body, not a heavenly one. And like Polaris, which has guided sailors for centuries, the human body's gut feelings and emotions can help guide a wayward soul back to his or her "essential self." In this absorbing combination of detailed self-awareness exercises and true stories from her own counseling experience (equal parts sobering and hysterically entertaining), Harvard-trained sociologist Martha Beck invites readers to explore their heart's desires and the vast social webs that keep such desires in check. The goal is not to forsake the "social self" and indulge every emotional impulse of the "essential self." Rather, Beck gives readers the tools and the encouragement to achieve maximum happiness by harmonizing these typically divergent voices.

Beck (author of Expecting Adam) admits that repairing a damaged emotional compass and setting out on such a vital journey--which often involves painful realizations and changes--"has all the combined attractions of suicide and childbirth." But the payoff, she concludes, is a love affair with real life. To that end, she walks readers through a lengthy exercise to evaluate their current lifestyle's pleasures and pains, teaches the process of listening to the body for directional cues, describes how to extract "soul shrapnel" (healing all those nasty, self-defeating emotional wounds), and provides an intriguing "Map of Change" to achieve an authentic life. Beck's impressive knowledge, her engaging (if somewhat irreverent) voice, and her ability to parse this scary process into achievable steps make her a new champion in the self-help arena. --Liane Thomas

Customer Reviews

Felt like a knife in my gut. (2004-10-30)

I tend to stay away from these books. But the reviews convinced me to take a look. I thought I was holding everything together and doing pretty well until I read "Finding Your Own North Star." Change is hard - make no mistake about that - but this book provides the encouragement and reinforcement that are required to get things going. Sometimes this is bitter medicine. Well worth the time and money if you have an inkling that life might offer more.

I read this in conjunction with Systemic Parenting: An Exploration of the Parenting Big Picture (Gaskill). Systemic Parenting is very similar to "Finding Your Own North Star," but focuses on what can be possible in the parent-child relationship. I think this is an important point to mention because our children are so enmeshed in our lives. I think Finding Your Own North Star kind of misses this point. It's important to keep our individual decisions in context to how they impact the family and our kids. Systemic Parenting helped fill this one gap in Finding Your Own North Star.

Both are exceptional resources.

A ground-breaker (2004-03-04)

Of all the books I have read on the subject (dozens and dozens, Kate White, SWZ, Ban Breathnach, I could do anything if only.., do what you love and... ) this is, by far, the very best. this one really digs into you to find, in every aspect of your life, what is truest to your essential self. You learn how to use your inner compass to make the best decision at any given time, no matter how small the choice.

Just What I Needed (2003-09-05)

This is the best book I have found on helping one discover what kind of work/career will truly bring them fulfillment. I've been looking for something like this for over 20 years, starting with "What Color is Your Parachute?", and followed by many more.

The book is great in that it not only provides a solid foundation and methods for helping this discovery, it also goes into the psychology that may hinder one's ability to do this, and offers real suggestions on what to do.

So many times I read what another reviewer calls "feel good books". I hate them too. They are a waste of time. This is the only book I've found that really offers something useful.

I read Po Bronson's "What Should I Do With My Life?", and loved it, because I saw how so many others also struggle with this issue, but was very disappointed that it didn't provide any thoughts or guidance to answer that question.

Until I read this book, I was coming to the conclusion that all of these self-help books are so much BS; now I have the atlas for my journey.

Thank you Martha Beck!

Wonderful!! (2003-08-30)

Martha Beck is a great writer to start with - on top of that, her insights and ideas are enlightening. The book has short exercises (e.g. list three things that....) - the exercises are short enough to get you to do them but at the same time they really make you think. I recognize my north star and am making changes in my life to get back on course. This book is simply terrific - throughout reading it I could really relate to what she had identified.

Not just a self help book, but a keeper (2003-08-15)

This is an extremely helpful, not junky book for making life changes and decicding what works best for you. My life is moving another direction and I feel pleasently in control of the direction. Give it a few hours of your time

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Subjects > Health, Mind & Body > Self-Help